I was driving home this evening from a long work day. Normally I crank the tunes up to level 11, Spinal-Tap-style, but tonight something made me refrain from even turning the radio on.
I drove home in complete silence. Apart from the sound of my car, I just sat and drove home with just my thoughts. It was amazing. And very illuminating. The feeling of just moving along the same route I've taken for the last 8 months, with a difference, made me realise something.
I'm fine.
I'm not being cute. I have realised that I am absolutely fine.
After years of a lot of self-reflection, counselling, therapy, meditation, kinesiology, breathwork, life coaching, mentorship at various places of work, long fireside chats with some pretty amazing people in my life, as well as the normal coming and going of the various little challenges I've faced in that time, I feel about as balanced and at peace in myself as I can remember feeling.
I am at the end of the tunnel, in fact, I'm probably way out in the fields that line the edges of that tunnel. If I remember the start of my walk through it, I had absolutely no idea I could ever feel this way, serene and calm and unflappable. I had no idea I could sit in my car in silence and be at peace with the thoughts that floated to the surface. They were things like "this feels good" and "gosh, I have a nice life, when you really look at it" and "I wonder what's for dinner."
In fact, I've been fine for some time.
I drove home in complete silence. Apart from the sound of my car, I just sat and drove home with just my thoughts. It was amazing. And very illuminating. The feeling of just moving along the same route I've taken for the last 8 months, with a difference, made me realise something.
I'm fine.
I'm not being cute. I have realised that I am absolutely fine.
After years of a lot of self-reflection, counselling, therapy, meditation, kinesiology, breathwork, life coaching, mentorship at various places of work, long fireside chats with some pretty amazing people in my life, as well as the normal coming and going of the various little challenges I've faced in that time, I feel about as balanced and at peace in myself as I can remember feeling.
I am at the end of the tunnel, in fact, I'm probably way out in the fields that line the edges of that tunnel. If I remember the start of my walk through it, I had absolutely no idea I could ever feel this way, serene and calm and unflappable. I had no idea I could sit in my car in silence and be at peace with the thoughts that floated to the surface. They were things like "this feels good" and "gosh, I have a nice life, when you really look at it" and "I wonder what's for dinner."
In fact, I've been fine for some time.
This makes me smile.
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