Monday, March 26, 2012

On strength

I'd like to call out something.... in writing my memoirs, I have been called "strong" a lot. I don't have a problem with being recognised for that, but I feel uncomfortable with the attribution, it's almost like I have a special talent that means I am to be admired for getting through what happened in my marriage.  I have to admit that I don't see it that way at all. I believe I have developed strength from going through it all, and that all these years later I can appreciate the pain somewhat for giving me the ability to write about it.

It's like that with any challenge in life, you either build up strength, or give up. There really is no other choice, and I had no other choice than to get through it or give up. You have to get strong through what life throws at you, or you stop moving forward. Everyone has challenges in life, and that's what we do, we face them and get stronger.

In fact, that was something that I chose to do for a while. I did give up and stopped moving forward altogether. I almost destroyed myself. I was not strong in those moments, and I considered ending it all.

So, please don't give me more credit than is due. I don't have all this strength as a natural resource, anyone who would have walked in my shoes could survive what I have done. It's like going to the gym, you destroy muscle fibres with weights to build up strength and resistance. You get bigger muscles.

It's exactly like that, with life. You face challenges, you feel a little torn up by them when you're going through them, then afterwards you develop emotional strength.

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